Saturday, October 02, 2004
today went out with ryan, bernardo n alfreda to watch resident evil. pretty cool show overall. nc-16 they check like crazy loh haha. so sian. alot of action n those shocking scenes typical of a horror movie. very nice. but they reused some baddies from the first one so tt made it a little less exciting but the nemesis dude was cool man. alot of excitement all the way la but it slowed down near the end. still cool tho, out of 5 i tihnk i'll give like abt 3.5 loh. so anywae, after tt we went to play pool. haha. quite fun la. overall a pretty gd dae, but still dont totally have the mood to enjoy tho, so tt made the dae a little less fun than it could be. pity.
yup so anywae these few days relli dead bored la. i got like no mood to play at all since o levels are just looming around the corner n i just noe i gota start piaing but i oso got no mood to study at all la. feel so exhausted mentally. freak. gota restart again. cant afford to stop my revision or i'll plunge back to my pre-prelims standards. sad la. n then the teachers give so much work already. 3 sciences all got one paper each, the chua oso give 2 mcq n png gave this montford prelim 04 which alfred says is super hard so.. yeah... crap... i tihnk if i start tmr then cannot finish leh... freak. why liddat???? sian man. was thinking of starting to pia tmr... wah lan. the thought of returning to kap just pains me. but it IS the only place i can conc la... sadly... never relli expected to end up studying there haha. if u told me 6 months ago that i'll be studying effectively in kap i'll prolly just laugh my ass off. but oh well, to each his own.
bored. dun wana study, dun wana flunk. i believe in miracles.
the death parade is over! finally... we've now come to the beginning of the end. the final leg of the o level preparations...
all my papers have been returned and i'll now shamelessly post the marks. i'll post my common test grade n my prelim grade for kicks.
lang:
eng - b3 -> a2 - quite expected i think. was lucky cos i thought i screwed my compo at first, n the compre was tough. was hoping for an a1 thought but am satisfied anywae.
chi - c5 -> c6 - sad man haha. deserve it cos i din study for it. the only sub i deproved in. have promised myself to put in more effort in it for o's, aiming for b.
math:
e math - a1 -> a1 - quite gd, though alot of careless mistakes for my paper 1. happy here.
a math - c5 -> a1 - tyco. worried for this one cos i barely got a1 den i tihnk i din have much careless mistakes so marks deducted cos i DONT KNOW how to do. need to practice more to secure.
humanities:
geog - b3 -> a2 - very lucky here. expected to flunk paper 2 n get paper 1 to pull up but in the end my paper 1 flunked n paper 2 pulled up. so stupid. lucky lucky. need to do more tys.
ss/ehist - c5 -> b3 - quite glad here, finally see some improvement. break out of the c5 cycle haha. must try to work on my sbq cos my seq not too bad liao. got l5 ans! yeah! haha. kudos to jo for his amazing notes.
science:
physics - b4 -> b3 - lucky!!! haha. expected just pass. lol. thought i flunked prac but it turned out to be one of the better papers. haha. pulled down by paper 2. must go n memorise more explanations and practice more past yr papers.
chem - a1 -> a1 - barely got it then begged mrs chua for half mark for a1. lucky cos i expected b3. the paper was tough man. i think i shud do more past yr papers here.
bio - b4 -> a1 - the most lucky achievement haha. initially expected b3. prac pulled me up by lots lots lots. tyco crap. in any case, quite happy here, but i think it wud be hard to maintain for o's. need to do more past yr papers too.
prelim L1R5 - 8 points.
ok so that's that. as mentioned in most of the reflections, alot of my marks were quite tyco. highly unexpected. if u've read my previous posts u'd noe that i was preparing myself for l1r5 of about 15 and it was relli true. i hadn't expected to get such tyco grades. i'm not complaining cos this has been my goal n i shud be able to get into hc now but i jus dont feel that happy leh. i relli feel i dun deserve it. PLEASE PLEASE i'm not trying to despise ppl hu din get wat they wanted and i relli do not want any more points. i'm relli satisfied with my points but i cant relli be happy cos like i said its quite tyco. den again mebbe its cos i noe i cant freaking play n i dont have the mood to anywae cos i gota start mugging for o levels like in a few daes time. giving myself up to sundae to slack after which i'll be returning to my hole in kap to hibernate and be one with my books. boring. sad. worst part is i got no mood to play at all and i dun dare to install gunbound cos i scared kena hooked unto it again haha. longing...
to all those out there who didn't get what they wanted, remember that prelims are only temporary, the o levels are ultimately the most important. besides, not to despise everyone but i kind of think our school fared quite badly overall as compared to last year's batch. its like after my seniors got their results last yr they all had like 6, 7 points so i had initially expected like 1/2 to 2/3 of the class to get a1s for each subject that kind of thing. i guess it was not to be. esp phy man, like only 2 a1 loh. siao man. den eng only 3. crazy messed up shit.
so to everyone taking ur o levels this year, jia you! if even i can get the kind of score that i did den u guys all definitely can one man. jus imagine this whole year my msg never got less than 4 until common test then 3 point something loh. u guys definitely can bring ur score down one! now i truly believe its possible. gogo everyone! (and i myself gota work hard lots too...sigh...)
and to the j1s, good luck for ur promos! u guys are damn smart so i'm sure u got no problems one la so dun worry too much abt it.
2 more months to freedom...
and too all big babies out there... happy children's day!
Thursday, September 30, 2004
oh yea 4got to mention tdy damn suay man. kena caught for gambling in class by GOPAL loh. wtf?! can be any suayer meh haha. its like everyone's attention all so immersed in gambling tt no one even noticed gopal till he reached out n swiped all the cards off the table into that stupid garbage bag of his. ah well... senile old folks, part of our ageing population, pity them. but in any case, hope he dussen report it to "the jeffery" if not we kena sai man haha. 1 more month in sch dun wana be kicked out just yet. if not must be private candidate sian man haha.
The Death Parade Day 3 is over...
did quite ok i guess. greatly exceeded expectation. find myself uber tyco. more or less know my l1r5 liao but i'm getting back the rest of my papers tmr so i'll do a round-up then.
ms cheong was telling us abt how it was gd to relieve stress, quoting blogging as an example, tdy which may help improve performance. could it be working? i seem to have started blogging only sometime after the common tests till now... hmmm... just a thought though i tihnk its quite stupid haha. n she kept dissing kap tdy. wtf? i am a personal testament to the fact tt the environment can be damn effective loh. stupid.
Wednesday, September 29, 2004
The Death Parade Day 2 is over...
had quite abit of improvement. satisfied. some expectedly horrid results too haha.
now waiting for my humanities and english score. c'mon please.
went out with 4j ppl today. quite enjoyable actually. havent actually been out with them very much. watched the terminal which was relli hilarious. "do you have an appointment?" haha
Tuesday, September 28, 2004
The Death Parade Day 1 is over...
pleasantly surprised. please teachers, keep me surprised.
last paper tmr, geog mcq. why must it always be last? anyway, better go study now, need to pull my paper 2 marks up cos i noe i'm gona flunk it.
Monday, September 27, 2004
first things first, my dad jus got a wireless router so now i can use my laptop from the comfort of my own room! whee! ok now tt that's done i better get back to reality
seem like everyone is crapping up for their prelims. well, i'm not gona ask u guys to cheer up since i will probably be feeling the same thing when i start getting back my papers tmr but well, gota look ahead! and i'll certainly try to remember tt when i myself am getting back crappy results. tmr tmr... bio n chem. sigh. the 2 sciences. very scared here. i seemed to have flunked both. wed, e math, hope its ok... thurs, eng, a math, phy n geog. the big day man. on fri, chi n ss. the crap day. relli worried now tt certain images of mine seem to have shattered. haiz... scared scared... currently just trying to adjust my mindset n hope for the best, no longer relli hoping for hc but somewhere else. sis ask me not to go sa n parents surely wun allow me to go ac. where does tt leave me? i relli dont noe now... if i cant go hc den i prolly cant go nj so those 2 are out. anderson's relli far away but i may have no choice here. sigh. why liddat???
Sunday, September 26, 2004
i've recently had the opportunity to chat with a few of my rather long lost primary sch frens like baba n tim i have since found it a great way to take my mind off the oh-so dreaded prelim results. granted, those marks are still looming at the edge of my conscience but like mj is so fond of saying "if u cant do anything abt it, why worry? only give urself more stress". which is definitely true so i'll try. ok like i said i was renewing my acquaintance, or more appropriately, friendship with these wonderful ppl n have since relaxed my mind abt the prelims. its more or less a general sentiment tt everyone thinks he/she will do badly and end up in a horrid jc or poly so i guess everyone's feelings the same thing as me. and then we were toking abt having a reunion which is so totally cool haha. oops i feels so kay-poh but ANYWAY, i'm relli interested to see how everyone is doing now haha. since everyone their separate ways in p6, it seems everyone is doing well somewhere n tt jus jogs my curiousity since i'm still so loser here. =(
ok recently i have been thinking quite alot abt religion. being born a catholic and baptised at birth, i've never relli had any occasion to understand and choose a faith which i may personally feel is more suited to my own needs. that may or may not be a bad thing since i probably won't noe or bother to make a suitable choice anywae but either way its too late. i'm stuck with my faith and i just have to try and accept it. all my life i cant relli say i've ever been relli close to god or anything. i prayed when i remembered n i went to church every sunday but i kind of ended there. this year however, things started to go quite off course in my life (imo) n i have since drifted even further from god. it was only until yesterday when baba came n toked to me more abt god tt i tried to revert back n perhaps improve on my religion. tho seemingly whimsical, baba managed to convince me n i would now like to share wat i think abt religion. i hope u wud excuse me since some parts might seem like blasphemy but oh well... okay, so basically i believe religion is sort of a psychological club where u develop a relationship with god, kind of like a gym to build up ur body. god may or may not exist but the main thing abt religion is u learn to believe he exists, kind of like how u havent actually seen another galaxy but u believe its there. it may not exist but the main thing is that u believe it does. so i kind of think all religions have the same aim, be it buddhism, hinduism, christianity or wat not, it was all established with the goal of imparting the belief and knowledge of god to other, much like a t-shirt, a t-shirt is bascially something u wear with the purpose of clothing urself but there are so many diff sizes, u gota choose the one tt fits comfortably and is not too large or small n the same goes of religion, there are so many types but the main thing is tt u choose the one tt suits u best. so wat exactly is the purpose of believing in god? it's to achieve happiness. oft times u hear ppl toking abt how u may be materially rich but spiritually poor and it kind of means u have noe fulfillment in life. if u got rich cos u cheated n conned ur way to the top den u probably wont feel any sense of well-being at all. on the other hand, if ur poor but u believe u have been a good person n tt god will bring u to heaven for tt den wouldn't u be happy? unafraid of the afterlife cos u believe god will be there to guide u? also if u believe tt god has a greater plan for u den everytime u fail won't u noe n trust tt its god's work cos u noe something good will come out of it and still be happy? take for example a religious family tt's well to do, one day the dad dies and all of a sudden there's noone for the kids to love, but if they believe that god and heaven exsists den they can set their mind at rest that their dad has gone to a better place to live in and they can go on and lead happy lives? THAT is exactly wat religion is all about. i guess its altogether possible tt u can live ur entire life without any belief in a higher power but when u grow old and are abt to die any time n leave ur possesions behind might u not look ahead and hope tt the afterlife might be something more than emptiness? where it might be a place or luxury where u can look after ur loved ones from above or something? i cant claim to have very much faith and i'm hell definitely not preaching but i guess i'm now trying to get myself more into a deeper relationship with god n all ni i'm jus trying to share my thought with all u guys. feel free to ask me any questions abt this, i believe tt questioning ur faith is the only way to strengthen it and i am stuggling like crazy with my faith now so yep.
[Tag]!
[Me]!
Kev;kcwl;kc
[b/-\i].
hpps;tchs;hci
things i love...
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wushu!
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