Of Greener Grass and Escapades

Wednesday, October 20, 2004

finally... the beginning of the end.

strangely, i dont feel as nervous about tmr as i did before my prelim chem prac which, incidentally or not, was also the first paper of my prelims. hopefully its cos this time round i'm much more prepared than before and not cos i'm feeling haolian. and indeed, mrs chua has drilled as very very well with a last min session today with excellent notes (which i personally feel wud be more useful if she gave it to us slightly earlier) and i would definitely not like to let her down by not getting a good grade. hopefully an a1... n speaking of letting teachers down, all of a sudden i feel like i dont wana let any teachers down, with the exception of huang miao yin (chinese u understand...). hopefully, just hopefully, i wont be letting them down. i wud jus hate for me to come back nxt yr n see their disappointed faces telling me the while class did well except some jokers n blah blah blah. u noe how tt goes. n it kinda jus sux to noe tt all ur education in the past 4 yrs have come down to these few decisive daes. its like everytime i got a paper during my prelims i spend a few seconds thinking, "hey, i've got my future rite in front of me now. i can actually choose to go wherever i want now. i can either put in my best n go to a good jc or i can even hand in a blank script." n de i start wondering, wat if i hand up a blank script? wat wud happen to me then? n den i get all jittery and... u noe the rest. but for prelims fortunately everything went well enough for me. wat if it dussen go well for my o's? everyone's saying, "how bad can u screw up o's?" n tt gets me started thinking... wat if...? sigh. this is scary. i relli hope i'll do well. at least well enough to get into hc. i relli do wana remain there n i wud totally hate it if i had to leave after the first 3 months. tt wud totally suck big time man. haiz. n i suddenly think as thought my preparations for my o's weren't as thorough as tt for my prelims. hmmm... i've done all my science papers n i've started a little on humans... i cant relli sae i did much less for prelims but i relli jus cant help but feel like my preparations aren't as good now. sigh... i can only hope for the best.

to all those taking ur o lvls with me now, good luck and all de best to u guys! only about 1 month more till absolute freedom! c'mon we can do it! at least i hope i can. yeah! gogogo....

sNooZe.
9:27 PM